KANISA GEORGE
How do you practise self-love?
On the surface, this appears to be a simple question. We wax, tweeze and apply an assortment of creams and lotions that add a touch of je ne sais quoi to our lives. But is self-love a concept we fully grasp?
To be frank, self-love isn't something we are taught to pursue. Instead, we are conditioned to focus on every relationship in our lives besides the one with ourselves.
In truth, most women correlate self-love with pampering and spa days and purchasing high-end products.
While this approach isn't wholly wrong, it sometimes has the effect of reducing the act of self-love to beauty regimes and retail therapy. So, do we have the wrong approach when it comes to practising self-love?
Self-love is defined as a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support physical, psychological, and spiritual growth. It typically involves having a high regard for one's own well-being and happiness.
Choosing self-love can be challenging at times, for it sometimes requires us to prioritises our own needs and place our well-being above others. Selfish? Not so much.
Studies have shown that practicing self-love and compassion are essential to our mental health and well-being, for it keeps depression and anxiety at bay.
Having a deep understanding of self-love and compassion helps us adjust to the many struggles we face in our daily lives and relationships. It allows us to manage our need to hold onto the ever-changing phantasm of perfection and the unrealistic expectations placed on us by society.
Self-love can mean different things for each individual, and how you exercise it depends on numerous factors. Therefore, figuring out what self-love looks like for you individually is important to your mental health and well-being.
Women are notorious for cultivating an inner bully. We allow this giant to constantly put us down for things that hold no significant value.
One way to practice self-love is by making your inner voice your ally. Instead of thoughts that say you aren't good enough, replace them with thoughts that acknowledge your strengths and the strides you've made thus far. Make your inner voice your biggest supporter, even when you make a blunder, and things don't work out quite as you hoped.
Have you ever wondered why it's so easy for us to pay a compliment to a friend or a complete stranger but ridicule and judge ourselves? According to psychologists, this signals a lack of self-compassion and self-love.
To remedy this, psychologists recommend constantly using words of compassion when referring to oneself and practising forgiveness when you aren't genuine or nice to yourself. Instead of highlighting all the things you dislike about yourself, practice being kind, patient, gentle and compassionate, the same way you would with someone you care about.
Self-love is more than just wearing designer clothing or expertly applying makeup every time you go out. But how we look on the outside largely impacts how we feel on