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Mahabir-Wyatt: ‘Men become abusive when power over women challenged’ - Trinidad and Tobago Newsday

WOMEN’S rights advocate Diana Mahabir-Wyatt has said Anissa Rajgobin-Ageemoolar did everything right to escape an abusive marriage, but almost lost her life trying.

Rajgobin-Ageemoolar, 47, survived an attempt on her life by her estranged husband Sharaz Ageemoolar on Monday.

He followed her into a business place in San Fernando where she had gone to renew her vehicle insurance, and shot her at close range, in a room full of people.

She survived, but he shot and killed an innocent bystander, Rosario “Danny” Ramdhan of Claxton Bay, and later killed himself in a car he stole from Kenton Moses, 30, a taxi driver, also of Claxton Bay.

Basdeo Rajgoobin, Rajgobin-Ageemoolar's father, said she was a victim of domestic abuse. He said her husband had abused her for years and very often she sought refuge at his home at Aripero. Her stay there was often short, as she returned to the marital home at Jones Street, La Romaine, to care for the couple’s two sons.

She left her husband several months ago, promising not to return to the abusive home. He initiated divorce proceedings and she consented.

The proceedings were almost in the final stages when he tried to kill her last Monday.

Mahabir-Wyatt said she did not know the circumstances which provoked such behaviour in this case, but alluded to men reacting violently when they felt their power was being eroded.

“Men are brought up with the feeling of entitlement.

"We live in a patriarchy. While we do have some women now rising to the top, the people who are the heads of boards and members of boards, and heads of religious and most organisations, are men.

“Yet the people who attend and do the work are women.

"We are accustomed to males being in authority and males are accustomed to being in authority. Men almost take it for granted that they have power over women and we have allowed them to feel like that because that is our reality as well.”

She said when men believe they are losing the power they laud over women who opt to leave when the situation becomes overbearing, the feeling of rejection comes into play.

“She was doing what she could, getting a divorce – but men’s egos can take that to mean you are rejecting them. If you are the only person they really have power over, and you are no longer allowing it, this can be very painful...That can shatter their egos.

"It does not apply to all men, but men who have fragile egos.

When men become accustomed to dominating women, she said, "And we decide we can’t take it any more and we leave, in their minds, they have two alternatives – to command you to come back, and you either return to the situation, or they kill you.”

The post Mahabir-Wyatt: 'Men become abusive when power over women challenged' appeared first on Trinidad and Tobago Newsday.

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