DR RADICA MAHASE

One of the most common misconceptions about autism is that people on the spectrum cannot express emotions, by extension, they cannot love and show love. If you speak with any parent of a child with autism, they will tell you how loving their children are and all the ways they show their love for parents/caregivers, siblings and others who share a close relationship with them.

As we celebrate Valentine’s Day, I am happy to share a short article written by my niece, Maya Nanan. Maya is 19 and her brother Rahul, who is on the autism spectrum, is only a year younger.

In this piece, Maya writes about her unconditional love for her brother and how he shows his love for her.

“The relationship that I have with my brother is a very special and unique one. We are not like most siblings. Even though we are different in many ways – for example, he's non-verbal, but I speak a mile a minute – we still manage to love each other unconditionally and not fight with each other like other siblings our age.

"We are one year apart, so we grew up doing everything together; we are very close and have been that way since we were toddlers. I'd like to think we're a dynamic duo. We're so close that sometimes people assume we're twins, and it's so hilarious to see their reaction when I tell them that we're not.

"My brother stands out wherever we go and it’s not only because of his height! At 18 years old, if he’s happy he will sing his nursery rhymes at the top of his voice!

"In our world that isn’t consider appropriate, so of course people would stare. In a world where persons can be so mean and judgmental, he is so pure, sweet and innocent. He doesn't know about bad mind, negative behaviour, hatred, and jealousy towards others. He is so loving, caring, and compassionate. He's also really funny and he repeats sentences/phrases that I say often, at the perfect moment and makes us laugh. He is also very charming and loving in every way possible.

"I like that he doesn't allow anyone to be mean to me and he hates it when I'm getting buff – he jumps in and stands up for me. This is his way of protecting me and I think it's the sweetest thing ever! That alone tells me how much he loves me!

"Growing up, we did everything together and we still continue to do so. Now that I can drive, we both go out together, by ourselves, whether it's to watch a movie or go for ice cream, and we manage perfectly fine. I am not afraid to take him with me anywhere. I love that he and I can do things together, alone.

[caption id="attachment_1000910" align="alignnone" width="1024"] Maya has been advocating for her brother since she was 12 years old. - Sataish Rampersad[/caption]

"Thankfully, I attend university online, so I get to spend a lot of time with him at home – sometimes I'm not quite sure who bothers who more or who hides from the other more. He shows his love for me by checking in on me constantly throughout the day, sharing his food, snacks and drinks with me and sometimes he comes into my room and stays with me, witho